Monday, February 16, 2009

Exception or the Rule @ 4:15 AM

Nope this will not be another zilian pictures post. It's a post V day post!

So, I watched this romantic comedy called : He's just not that into you.
The underlying message is probably What guys really think.

1) If he doesn't call after right after the first date.
2) If he doesn't marry you after being together for very long.
3) If he's not sleeping with you (since I hv to be conservative, this applies to married couples)

I'm just gonna talk about the 1st qns lar, since the next 2 don't apply to me.

I'm sure a lot of girls will find themselves in similar situation. You meet a guy at some event/occasion. You talked joked and seems to get along very well. You think something might be developing. You exchanged numbers. You think he is giving out the *signs*. You wait for his phone call. You do crazy things like stalking his FB account. But, in the end he doesn't call or make any attempt to contact u. ( this is specific to the movie ).

Of course in reality, there might be other situations ( up to u to decide which ones belong to me). Like he gave you a call suddenly to invite u for dinner, but it's actually a group dinner. But you're led into thinking that the fact that he called you when other people could hv called you, is a *sign*.
He always turn around when you walk into the lecture theatre, and you are delusioned into thinking that he notices you.
He *invites* you to visit him.
You talked about thanksgiving plans with each other and he said he would have invited you along if not for the fact that his car is full.
He seemed nice and accompany u to play the slots machine even though he doesn't like it?
He attends when you invite him to a party even though you barely talk to each other.
You find it very easy to talk to him about anything under the sun, but he's attached.
He calls you randomly, but he's attached.

etc etc

Just like what almost every girl will do, you start talking about ur situations with other friends. Some od the advices will be like, maybe he's testing the water? Flirt with him more etc etc. But in fact, the *guy* just doesnt seem to be doing some concrete things. But then pple assure you, don't worry maybe something will happen. And he still doesnt do anything. Then comes the maybe you shld ask him out advice. But you refuses because you're a girl. The comes the come on it's the 21st century, there r no rules against girls making the first move. Then you hear those wonderful
stories about how the girls make the first move n they end up happily together.

Which brings us back to the movie. Stories about how the guy didn't contact you but is actually interested in you and he's now the best bf in the world, or about how things aren't the way it is, or about how he just needs a nudge... they just belong to the exceptions. Truth is those r just the EXCEPTIONS. If the guy is genuinely interested in you, he will contact you soon after ur *date*, he'll attempt to talk to you often. He'll make it happen.

The guys I am interested in don't seem to be reciprocating the same interest, and I can't deny that I am guilty of deluding myself into thinkin that maybe he just need time. On various occasions, I am also tempted to just ask him out. But it's always a matter of time before I stop thinking about it and move on ( just like what every girl does as well?) but I can't deny that part of me still wish that something different will happen.

On the contrary, I just don't seem to be interested in guys who r interested in me.. Maybe i need to chg my expectations somehow... that will be another topic of interest.

Anyway, back to the main topic. I can be the one making the first move. I've asked for guy's opinions about if someone ask them out will they accept? They think its flattering of course they will accept, but the problem is their mindset. I can be in a relationship with a guy I like if I want, but do I really want that? Do I want to be in a relationship where I have to make all the effort cuz I might be expendable to the guy? Do I want to wait n be patient and hope that the guy will grow to like me slowly? Just like every other girl, I like to be pampered. I like to think that i am important to someone.

The movie was like a wake up call really. If the guy doesn't seem to be making concrete moves, the truth is He's just not that into you. He might/will go out with you if you ask him to, but he's just not into you enough to make an effort, and he probably has other girls in mind.

Anyway I am getting too long winded la, but the point is.. screw all the talk about how thr girls can make the first move. If the guy is interested enough, he will be the one asking u out. U wouldnt like to be with someone who doesnt like u enough.

So, yep I shall continue waiting :D

Monday, February 16, 2009

Exception or the Rule @ 4:15 AM

Nope this will not be another zilian pictures post. It's a post V day post!

So, I watched this romantic comedy called : He's just not that into you.
The underlying message is probably What guys really think.

1) If he doesn't call after right after the first date.
2) If he doesn't marry you after being together for very long.
3) If he's not sleeping with you (since I hv to be conservative, this applies to married couples)

I'm just gonna talk about the 1st qns lar, since the next 2 don't apply to me.

I'm sure a lot of girls will find themselves in similar situation. You meet a guy at some event/occasion. You talked joked and seems to get along very well. You think something might be developing. You exchanged numbers. You think he is giving out the *signs*. You wait for his phone call. You do crazy things like stalking his FB account. But, in the end he doesn't call or make any attempt to contact u. ( this is specific to the movie ).

Of course in reality, there might be other situations ( up to u to decide which ones belong to me). Like he gave you a call suddenly to invite u for dinner, but it's actually a group dinner. But you're led into thinking that the fact that he called you when other people could hv called you, is a *sign*.
He always turn around when you walk into the lecture theatre, and you are delusioned into thinking that he notices you.
He *invites* you to visit him.
You talked about thanksgiving plans with each other and he said he would have invited you along if not for the fact that his car is full.
He seemed nice and accompany u to play the slots machine even though he doesn't like it?
He attends when you invite him to a party even though you barely talk to each other.
You find it very easy to talk to him about anything under the sun, but he's attached.
He calls you randomly, but he's attached.

etc etc

Just like what almost every girl will do, you start talking about ur situations with other friends. Some od the advices will be like, maybe he's testing the water? Flirt with him more etc etc. But in fact, the *guy* just doesnt seem to be doing some concrete things. But then pple assure you, don't worry maybe something will happen. And he still doesnt do anything. Then comes the maybe you shld ask him out advice. But you refuses because you're a girl. The comes the come on it's the 21st century, there r no rules against girls making the first move. Then you hear those wonderful
stories about how the girls make the first move n they end up happily together.

Which brings us back to the movie. Stories about how the guy didn't contact you but is actually interested in you and he's now the best bf in the world, or about how things aren't the way it is, or about how he just needs a nudge... they just belong to the exceptions. Truth is those r just the EXCEPTIONS. If the guy is genuinely interested in you, he will contact you soon after ur *date*, he'll attempt to talk to you often. He'll make it happen.

The guys I am interested in don't seem to be reciprocating the same interest, and I can't deny that I am guilty of deluding myself into thinkin that maybe he just need time. On various occasions, I am also tempted to just ask him out. But it's always a matter of time before I stop thinking about it and move on ( just like what every girl does as well?) but I can't deny that part of me still wish that something different will happen.

On the contrary, I just don't seem to be interested in guys who r interested in me.. Maybe i need to chg my expectations somehow... that will be another topic of interest.

Anyway, back to the main topic. I can be the one making the first move. I've asked for guy's opinions about if someone ask them out will they accept? They think its flattering of course they will accept, but the problem is their mindset. I can be in a relationship with a guy I like if I want, but do I really want that? Do I want to be in a relationship where I have to make all the effort cuz I might be expendable to the guy? Do I want to wait n be patient and hope that the guy will grow to like me slowly? Just like every other girl, I like to be pampered. I like to think that i am important to someone.

The movie was like a wake up call really. If the guy doesn't seem to be making concrete moves, the truth is He's just not that into you. He might/will go out with you if you ask him to, but he's just not into you enough to make an effort, and he probably has other girls in mind.

Anyway I am getting too long winded la, but the point is.. screw all the talk about how thr girls can make the first move. If the guy is interested enough, he will be the one asking u out. U wouldnt like to be with someone who doesnt like u enough.

So, yep I shall continue waiting :D